“He cried and cried for days, regretting his decisions and thinking about how he could have done things differently.”
If you’ve read the previous sentence, it must have given birth to a few stories. You are already judging that character. You know that he was a guy – could be a teenager, a young adult or an old man; but definitely not a toddler. But did the sentence tell you all this? No.
We, humans, are beautiful creatures, but more than beautiful – we are intelligent. We learn things that we observe, hear, touch or feel. And after evolving to the next generation of our species, we’ve learned how to share our knowledge with each other in real-time.
We are also passionate creatures. We laugh and we cry. We love and we hate. We feel embarrassed, giggly, motivated, underconfident; we feel differently about different things at different times.
But we are also the only known species in the world, which is confused by trying to make sense of feelings. We constantly have been trying to interpret emotions and feelings with intelligence and wisdom. Whenever we cry, we start finding a reason as to why we did cry in the first place. Does it matter? We cry because we feel sad – we cry because we don’t feel right – we cry because something changed that hurt our soul. Does it really have to be logical? Do we really need to have a reason for feeling just sad? Why can’t we “just be sad”?
And sometimes, when we are feeling good – we start thinking about the million things that can go wrong. We start trying to explain our happiness in words – by trying to interpret it logically. Why were you so happy about the last time? Now – there’s a question that you will have an answer for. But that question is fundamentally inapt. The fact that you felt good – is the only thing that matters. That event sparked your soul – you don’t need a reason for it.
As we humans grow older – we start trying to interpret the world logically. We start becoming happy about our possessions – remember that favorite pen that you had in your school days? Or that favorite spot of yours where you used to hang-out in your neighborhood. We start craving for attention and social acceptance. And when you grow old enough, those objective needs become the key component for you to be happy.
That’s where it all goes wrong. Think about when you were 5 years old. I know there’s a blur image in everyone’s head about when they were 5. Your mom feeding you? Your laugh when you learned to jump? And when you looked at that beautiful flower? Or that sweet smell that you could just sniff for hours? Or whenever you ate something yummy? Those things would make you feel happier even today – but not fractionally as much as it would do when you were 5. And since then and now, the only thing that has changed is your “wisdom“. You were intelligent back then too!
But your intelligence wasn’t boxed under a set of rules that you live in the world with. How to react in society – you couldn’t care less. Who’s the other person in the room – religion, nationality, color, gender – didn’t matter to you. Why did your beloved friend refuse your invitation – you didn’t know the meaning to invite so it didn’t matter to you. But does it really matter what they do? The only thing that should matter is how you feel when you are with them. Not who they are, or what they did to you, or who they are in a relationship with.
It doesn’t matter how big your home is, or how many cars you own. It doesn’t matter how beautiful or handsome your partner is, as long as you feel good when you are with them. It doesn’t matter if someone abused you on the road, or if someone insulted you in front of a thousand people. It doesn’t matter because you are associating it with the rules that have been written by a chaotic society. Those aren’t your rules. But you haven’t! Not yet!
Let this article be a realization to you – to stop following those stupid rules of this society born out of the chaos of human intelligence. Leave that behind. Follow your primal instincts. Whatever makes you feel good – do that even if it’s illogical or doesn’t make sense or looks stupid.
Words or literature is simply insufficient to describe a person, their feelings, their personality – words are too little to describe someone. So don’t make a perception about someone who you’ve known so little about – whatever you know is just what you’ve seen. There’s so much more to them. So much good. And so much bad as well. But just remember – those good or bad don’t matter. What matters is how you feel around that particular “someone”.